E-Mailbag for July 8, 2000

Ramona wrote:

I wanted to know what is the black room of death?

BeckerManEX: If I told you I would then have to put you in that room.
Hairball: It's just a glitch in the game, it doesn't do anything.
Tiger: A Black Room of Death, simply put.
BlackMage: Go there and find out >:)
TWGamer: Some glitch when you rocket yourself into the central spire of Peach's castle in Super Mario 64

Luigim64 wrote:

ha......uh........ha......uh......hairball......i am your father

BeckerManEX: I thought Hairball had two moms?
Hairball: Ummm....no you are not.
Tiger: yesss...you aree...::rolls eyes::
BlackMage: answer
TWGamer: (darth vader music)

David000005 wrote:

You! I wanta game where you can be the mario cast or bond or dark or Banjo or Zelda or any other N64 character and go poke-hunting! Is there going to be a game like that? If not, why not! I want YOU to make one and post it on sm64c. How can I make a site like yours. Iv'e tryed, but I allways have long names like fly_like_butt/me.com WHY?

BeckerManEX: Hairball didn't even design this site, so don't ask him how to do a successful design or the site around it. LOL.
Hairball: Nah.
Tiger: Ehh...confusing.
BlackMage: WOAH lots of zeros in your nick, are you a member of Zero-X? One thing is that you gotta get better hosting than geocities
TWGamer: Like a remake of Yoshi's Safari? yay! no chance of that happening though. We're is too lazy to make games. To get a free domain go to http://www.namezero.com

LuigiHann wrote:

In the article about Koopa Troopa someone seemed to be wondering about Koopa the Quick's relation to normal Koopa Troopas. When you talk to Koopa the Quick in Tiny-Huge Island he says that Tiny-Huge Island is his home, which implies to me that he is just a normal Koopa Troopa, only giant.

BeckerManEX: WOW. Thanks for the info.
Hairball: Koopa the Quick is Mario's "friend", I guess. But don't you notice that in Mario Party 1 and 2, that the Koopas are on Mario's side now and that they are scared of Bowser?
Tiger: Nice imput.
BlackMage: Thats cause he is. Did you expect him to be SuperTroopa or something?
TWGamer: LuigiHann get's an 'A' for observation there. Next please

Funkym3977 wrote:

What is the difference between bowser and Koopa are they the same? or are they two seperate people.

BeckerManEX: Bowser is King of the Koopas.
Hairball: It's King Bowser Koopa. Koopa is the name of the turtles in the Koopa family. Bowser is the name of the king...
Tiger: Koopa's are bowser's soldiers of sorts.
BlackMage: Bowser is the Koopa king, the Koopas are his troops
TWGamer: The correct name for Bowser is 'King Bowser Koopa' and 'Koopa'is also Bowser's race of people

Allison wrote:

IS it true that when you back flip into the waterfall it will take you somewhere?

BeckerManEX: Yes.....not really.
Hairball: No.
Tiger: yes, it will take you behind the waterfall.
BlackMage: See Hairballs witty and pointless answer
TWGamer: I have no Idea

Megatendo wrote:

1.is there any way to translate the japanese nintendo site to english?2.it seems like mario tennis is boring does it have any cool features (super raquets) 3.is paper mario a real smrpg sequel? 4.your site rocks

BeckerManEX: 1) Learn Japanese or visit NOA at nintendo.com 2)I thought Mario Golf would be boring when I read about it, I mean come on its GOLF for cripes sake, but look how sweet it turned out. 3) Yes, I'm afraid to say that it is. 4) Thanks. I try hard.
Hairball: 1. Learn Japanese, or some Asian language (trust me, it's really similar). 2. Yes 3. Yes 4. Thank you.
Tiger: no, dunno, yes, thanks
BlackMage: 1. yeah you gotta find someone that knows japanesse 2. Mario Tenis would be boring if you played it by yourself but if you played multiplayer with a bunch of friends it would kick-arse! 3. Indeed it is my friend. 4. Oh yea!
TWGamer: 1. Get a Japanese friend to tell you it, 2. Haven't a clue, 3. Yes, 4. Thanks!

SM64C tastes like me wrote:

I want to know how to open the first level in SM64. Do I need to have beaten bowser? I want mario tennis for free. Give it to me now. Is Dks choice of game yahtzee or twister ? hyderfdyjrftygdurywegdbhj

BeckerManEX: Well Sm64C tastes like ass in my opinion so you taste like ass? Time for your monthly shower. The rest of your question is well...a joke I assume. No one is that dumb.
Hairball: Walk up to the door and you can get to the first level. You ain't getting any free games here.
Tiger: Twister. Fun to watch gorillas get hernias. heehee
BlackMage: I swear that people sit around all day writing out stupid letters just to piss Tiger off. Keep up the good work! (PS. SM64c doesn't give out free games cause Hairballs a cheap bastard)
TWGamer: The first level in SM64 you just walk through the door that works and jump in the picture (duh). Mario tennis isn't out yet, and you don't get it free you cheapo.

Wes wrote:

Hairball you should do more of those fake interviews with nintendo mascots. Solergamer you should work on those super mario saga stories or your never gonna get fifty of 100. All of you do a great job keap up the great work on THE BEST MARIO SITE ON THE INTERNET.

BeckerManEX: Those interviews in my opinion are a seriously dumb thing. But its Hairball's special, let him deal with it.
Hairball: Yes, I'll do more fake intereviews...
Tiger: HB is lazy...solar is busy...and thanks for misspelling "keep."
BlackMage: 1. He would continue them but people wouldn't understand that he put "Fake Interviews" and they flooded him with hatemail 2. Solergamer needs to be a lazy ass like me, he does too much :-) 3. W00T!
TWGamer: Hairball should make some more fake interviews, yes. Solar seems to have disappeared at the moment so no Saga, but you can read my stories though! :) Thanks for the compliments!

Mario wrote:

how much money do you make on the site

BeckerManEX: Enough to light our cigars with 50 dollar bills.
Hairball: Around $30-60 US a month.
Tiger: dunno, I made like $10 off some ads, but HB gets more. Lucky idiot.
BlackMage: I make nothing off of this site, but Hairball gets $40 a month from advertising which he spends on webhosting and games to review.
TWGamer: I make very little since I only have 1 ad on it, HB makes tons of $ though.

ROMs wrote:

Can you guys put rom on your site please lite TKM?

BeckerManEX: See there is this thing called the LAW, and we here at SM64C like to go by it....[most of the time].
Hairball: Nope.
Tiger: ROMs are illegal, and SM64C will not condone any of it's actions.
BlackMage: We would but romz would just eat up all of our monthly bandwidth limits, also Nintendo would sue us.
TWGamer: I suppose it wouldn't be too bad, as TMK only has non-commercial ROMs which are not illegal, but most of them suck, and take up too much space.

Karen wrote:

where can I buy mario tee shirts for kids? Or any mario products?

BeckerManEX: http://store.nintendo.com
Hairball: You can buy them in the Nintendo Power Supplies catalog, if you're a NP subscriber. They have this stuff time and time again.
Tiger: Try going to some store like Target, or check second hand stores.
BlackMage: Theres a cool site called Nintendo.com which is a site made by Nintendo and they should have an online store.
TWGamer: I'm not really sure, I've never seen any Mario T-Shirts

Magnum wrote:

This is the best Mario site I have ever seen! It is the greatest ever! I visit it very frequently it kicks ass! It is a site about Mario and Bowser and Yoshi and all the nintendo characters. One suggestion from me would be to have a poll asking what everybody's favorite Nintendo character is. My favorite character is Bowser =) Keep up the excellent work guys!

BeckerManEX: We used to have a poll, it musta died. BRING BACK THE POLL!!
Hairball: We've already had that poll before.
Tiger: Thanks. I think HB should have a poll too. A character poll would be one that people wouldn't want to mess around with. Not like "Rate this site" polls...people tend to click "bad" 100 times.
BlackMage: This is just a pat on the back letter, i dont really got a response to it...
TWGamer: Thanks for the compliments! According to Hairball 64, the poll kills load time so it won't be coming back.

this person wrote:

hey do you know when the atari will come out i am planning to give my son one for his birthday

BeckerManEX: Hahaha you must be kidding...it will be out 17 years ago.
Hairball: Look at the garbage dump, and maybe you'll find one.
Tiger: the atari will come out on November 7th, 2002. Stay tuned. LOL
BlackMage: The atari? no, give him an N64, he'll have more fun with that
TWGamer: Atari came out like 20 years ago, prat.

@$$ wrote:

give me alll your money or ill shoot you

BeckerManEX: You sure are and @$$.
Hairball: Sorry, I don't have any money. So will I get shot?
Tiger: ill shoot you? that doesn't make sense...yet again most emailbags don't...
BlackMage: * BlackMage lobs a fireball at @$$
TWGamer: Shoot me then

Magicone wrote:

On your hosting page, why don't you allow CGI, Perl files, EXE, and ZIP?What if we want a counter (CGI and PL) or want some Mario downloads (EXE and ZIP)???

BeckerManEX: I brought up this same point, and I do believe that it has been taken care of.
Hairball: I banned these file types because I don't want server abuse.
Tiger: Because those tend to suck up bandwidth, and SM64C cannot afford that. Plus, with cgi you can REALLY screw up a site with hacker know-how.
BlackMage: What you could do is email Hairball and make him put up the games on sm64c and link off there.
TWGamer: Hairball controls the SM64C hosting plan, ask him.

Yoshi wrote:

I have tried and tried and tried and tried, yet I still can't defeat the last Bowser. Is there any easy way of doing this?

BeckerManEX: Not really, just take some time and practice. I got it the first time, but that's just me.
Hairball: Pick him up, spin him around, and whip him onto one of the bombs, do that 3 times.
Tiger: Just kick in the nabs, grab his wallet, and run.
BlackMage: Hell Yeah! Kick him in the NUTZ!
TWGamer: Throw him into the bombs

PeachyBaby wrote:

Um, in your last email bag some swimmer person said that her friend told her in Super Mario 64 Peach turns into Bowser. You guys all said no way, etc. But it's kinda true...that portrait in the first Bowser world is Peach but when you get closer it turns into Bowser. Would that count?

BeckerManEX: Kinda.
Hairball: .......
Tiger: Nope.
BlackMage: ROFL
TWGamer: Very observant

WeIrD wrote:

Ok if you dont want me to write here anymore i'll stop alright. Oh and by the way BlackMage licks dirty asses, he told me. (brought to you by the society to kill Dewy aka. Matt Swider. For adress please contact me at killdewy.hotmail.com)

BeckerManEX: no comment.
Hairball: We'll let Mage answer that.
Tiger: Someone needs a checkup...
BlackMage: Wierd, stop talking sh*t you mother f*cker, im gunna beat you down and make you spend a week with Dewy. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
TWGamer: Don't write here anymore then, and Blackmage is dirty if he did that.

LoverGirl wrote:

How old are you hairball64 and all of you guys or girls? We already got the star but how do we get to it in big boo's balcony in Mario64? SeeYaLater Boyz and Girlz!

BeckerManEX: Hairball 64 is actually a 6 year old Cuban child who floated on shore about 2 years ago. We here at Sm64C have been raising him as our slave while we use his "name" as the leader of this site. Soon the time will come for his rage to unleashed upon the world, and none shall be saved.
Hairball: Right now I'm 14, almost 15. I'm a guy. Read the SM64 FAQ, I can't remember.
Tiger: HB is a weak and weeny 9th grader! bwhahaha!
BlackMage: Hairball is 35 Im a dude, hes a dude, shes a dude, we're all dudes!
TWGamer: 1. HB will tell you his age, 2. I am a guy, 3. Can't remember

I THINK MARIO IS THE BEST GAME IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD! wrote:

IS THERE ANY CHANCE THAT MARIO WILL GET A GAME ON GAMEBOY COLOR OTHER THAN THE SUPER OLD ONES FOR GAMEBOY, MARIO DX, OR MARIO GOLF? BECAUSE MARIO DX+ GOLF HAVE KINDA ALREADY COME OUT. DO YOU THINK NINTENDO MIGHT MAKE A BRAND NEW ADVENTURE FOR HIM ON THE GAMEBOY? JUST WONDERING

BeckerManEX: They are doing new Zelda games, that is more important right now.
Hairball: YES, HE'LL EVENTUALLY GET A NEW GAME ON THE GAME BOY, A BRAND NEW ADVENTURE, BUT PROBABLY NOT UNTIL GAME BOY ADVANCE COMES OUT, SINCE NINTENDO IS SO STUBBORN.
Tiger: Possibly for GBA. We will have to wait and see. I too, really want a Mario game on the Game Boy.
BlackMage: Well, at least you didn't ask for Pocket Mario64....
TWGamer: I DON'T KNOW. TAKE OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK BUTTON

Poophead wrote:

Poopoo Poopoo Poopoo. That is Poopoo Poopoo Poopoo. Sing with me now, Poopoo Poopoo Poopoo.

BeckerManEX: No.
Hairball: The washroom is that-a-way.
Tiger: ...
BlackMage: Hairball, what did we say about deleting retarded mails? Yeah, you're supposed to delete them.
TWGamer: Poopoo Poopoo to you too!

Da Rap Man wrote:

For my little sister's birthday, she remembered me. I had ten of my boys take her virginity.

BeckerManEX: You better give it back or she might tell.
Hairball: Wow, 10 at once, pretty interesting.
Tiger: That's nice. Now give her 10 years of therapy later in life...wait you need that right now.
BlackMage: Hairball, what did we say about deleting retarded mails? Yeah, you're supposed to delete them.
TWGamer: Hairball, this site is attracting Child Rapists; I am disturbed. Rap Man is getting high on Pokemon Hentai.

Excited wrote:

Man those Email bags are soooooooooooooooo so so so so so soooooooooooooooooo cool man! I love your Email bags! Yes I do, yes I do, yes I do! He he ha ha ho ho. I like to jump on the bed, smack my self silly and fart in the toylet so I ekos. I try to fart by a match but it don't work, can you tell me why? Is it okay to be attracted to Tiger? Can I have a sucker now?

BeckerManEX: You cannot have a sucker, but you are truely a fu*ker.
Hairball: No to all those questions, whatever the hell they are.
Tiger: No and no.
BlackMage: I think you're wierd....for liking Tiger otherwise you're an ok guy.
TWGamer: Those drugs are really too much for you

Steve Lewis wrote:

Your Email bags are GREAT! Hey Tiger, say, There Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat! Any way you sure have so funny sh*t in there. Like that one guy who said he ate your mom's pussy in bed, Da Rape Man. And you said cat instead of cunt, you mess up and he rapes people. And that peson that don't give personal informatin is a BITCH too.

BeckerManEX: How the F did you guys get out of the mental hospital or learn to use any of your fingers for other than exporing openings in your body. You are one of the freaking crazy idiots the populate this world and are taking oxygen from the normal people. God, die already.
Hairball: .......
Tiger: Hey.
BlackMage: I'll be submitting this email bag with a few name changes now....
TWGamer: Da Rap Man eats pussys and rapes his siblings.

My Grandmother was run over by Buffalo Water wrote:

In Super Mario 64 while on the roof, at the back, how come you can't fall into the courtyard when you know it's there? What a rip!

BeckerManEX: Dunno.
Hairball: Because SM64 was really rushed, so they didn't have time to fix these "little" things. The courtyard isn't really "outside" anyway.
Tiger: Yes, a rip.
BlackMage: The sky in the courtyard is painted on.
TWGamer: Probably Nintendo couldn't be bothered to put that little detail in.

BEATLEGIRL88 wrote:

Um, in Mario Kart 64, is there any way to obtain extra 'secret' characters or levels? I've been dying to know! Thanks!

BeckerManEX: Nope, sorry.
Hairball: No there are not.
Tiger: Practice makes perfect. If not, then go to www.gamefaqs.com
BlackMage: Not that I know of.
TWGamer: I Don't have Mario 64

Goombalover+mariopeach667 wrote:

Hallo, I have a question! Will Paper Mario be on the Nintendo 64? Oh, I hope it will! Cheers.

BeckerManEX: Yes it will be on Nintendo 64 on the stupid release date of Dec. 26th, 2000
Hairball: Yes it will.
Tiger: Of course.
BlackMage: Yeah, it will
TWGamer: It will be on the Nintendo 64.

me wrote:

when will i get my money? i always am working. i have 3 jobs, do all my chores, and i work for sites that pay me. but i never seem to get my money(i usually tell them to send it to my house). can you please give it to me. i live in my house in my neighborhood of my city in my state(this is the info i give them to send it to me). thank you ps:reading your old email i tried the lawnmower and it hurt. eps: how do you get that in the game? by trick or password

BeckerManEX: See above answer. In the words of the awesome Bloodhound Gang, "I hope you die!"
Hairball: 2 words to sum it up: You suck.
Tiger: you get your money when you get it.
BlackMage: You need to be more specific with your address dude...
TWGamer: I can't be bothered to read this sh*t

Happy wrote:

could you please send or upload a picture of the gold nintendo logo (the one at the start of mario kart) to use as my Windows 95 startup screen ??

BeckerManEX: You need to find someone with a capture card in their system.
Hairball: How do you change your startup screen anyway?
Tiger: erm...try another site.
BlackMage: Well, we'd have one up, if we had one to use.
TWGamer: no.

Spelling Police wrote:

I am Jeffery Smith from the S.P.D. And if you do not learn to spell the word colors, I will have to take you in. I have noticed that you spell colors like colours. I just have to tell you that it is spelt, colors. P.S. If I get any smart remarks from any of you little brats here, I will be back!

BeckerManEX: I agree its colors, and favorite, and flavor, etc.
Hairball: If you look it up in the dictionary, you'll notice that it's an alternate spelling, they are both right.
Tiger: stupid canadian HB spells it the conventional britsh way, which is correct as well.
BlackMage: You're going down.
TWGamer: IT'S COLOUR not COLOR!

Smokey wrote:

Do you know where I could find those old Nintendo 64 systems? I have looked everywhere and allI could find was Nintendo, Super Nintendo,Dophine, Game Boy, & Game Boy Color. Wal*Mart don't have them and the news paper don't have them either.

BeckerManEX: Funcoland.
Hairball: Old Nintendo 64 systems?
Tiger: Try eBay.
BlackMage: Did you try the local used games store or zellers?
TWGamer: Dophine? wake up or get off those drugs.

inside of a box shaped box wrote:

1. Why do people drink Diet Pepsi? 2. Why wasn't Kirby in Mario Kart 64? 3. They should make a game called Cactus Mario in Cactusworld. Cactus Mario would be a cactus as would everybody else and he would be fighting cactus enemies in order to collect cactusses and save Princess Cactus from the evil Cactus..Right? Everyone would be cactusses! GET IT??? HAHAHAHAHA!

BeckerManEX: Diet Pepsi tastes like someone pissed in Coke, he has no arms to steer the cart.
Hairball: 1. Fat idiots who think that drinking "diet" drinks has less fat, and Pepsi sucks. 2. I don't know. 3. .......
Tiger: 1. Morons that have no taste buds. 2. Dunno...maybe he would have sucked up everybody. 3. Cactus Mario Kicks..he's cool.
BlackMage: 1. Hell if i know, I dont, Pepsi is too fucking sweet and Diet makes POP like sh*t.
TWGamer: 1. To maintain body fluids, 2. Kirby isn't a Mario character, 3. Really??

inside of a box shaped box wrote:

1. Why do leaders of geeky videogame websites have really stupid names? 2. Why are videogame geeks so funny? 3. Are videogame geeks funny to non-videogame geeks? 4. Do you talk to your mirror? 5. Do you ever think you're Mario? 6. Are you sad when you find out you're not Mario? 7. Okay I lied. I really am inside a box shaped box. Please forgive me. 9. Will you post this anyway just because I'm stupid?

BeckerManEX: I'm a funny bad-ass bastard. Screw you.
Hairball: 1-3. I dunno. 4-7. No. 9. Yes, and learn to count.
Tiger: Stop the damn lists.
BlackMage: 1. Cause he thinks its cute 2. Cause of how much they know... and how much you dont know... 3. HELL YEAH! 4. No 5. NO, i am NOT fat 6. F*ck no, im happy to know im not 3 feet tall and 300pounds 7. Im inside of a box shaped box too!!! 9. Yes, I belive so.
TWGamer: Don't Know, Don't Know, Don't Know, No, No, I don't think I am Mario, No, You forgot 8, Yes

Dinobot743 wrote:

After Paper Mario and Mario Tennis are released, will there be anymore Mario games for N64?

BeckerManEX: No, those are the last ones, better start saving up for Dolphin.
Hairball: I'd take that as a no, unless Dolphin is seriously delayed.
Tiger: Possibly...but since Dolphin is coming up, we may not be sure.
BlackMage: Nope.
TWGamer: Probably Not